Last night I stared up at the pitch black sky and I stared deep.
After about five minutes I was overwhelmed by the audience I felt staring back at me.

My body felt like it would hit the ground and my spirit almost leapt out of my clay form to jump and dance around.

I was struck. Arrested. My body would not move.
To this audience, although the most powerful thing I've ever felt, I had nothing to prove.

My eyes were glued to the sky even though all I could see was black.
I knew. I know I was looking at more than that.

I was frozen as I stood.
With my chin held high I was looking at all that is good.

My heart began to beat hard in my chest.
My hands slowly made their way toward the sky and I confessed.

"Father, I believe."

God's Art

If I were a canvas, here's how it goes.
The color is awful, material ragged, and I'm covered in holes.


If I were drawing, I have to speak true.
It would be the worst thing looked at that's ever been drew. 


If I were the sticks of wood holding the material together.
I'm rotted, weak and ugly as ever.


This is truth about the painting that is me.
But this not the picture my God will allow you to see.


He has painted this canvas with the brightest, blood like red.
He has drawn on this canvas with a nail like led. 


The strength He has spilled upon my frame
takes the weakness of my exterior, makes it strong until there is no shame.


He has caused me to stretch myself until there is not one single hole.
For me to be one, complete, whole picture was His goal. 


To this canvas, God daily adds His no blemish paint.
If I were a person, you'd call me a saint.
He told Himself I was worth it. Worth every drop.
His blood ran like a river so the picture of my life He could crop.

Cut out the unholy, unrighteous and impure.
Replace it with glory, set a flame in my soul and stir!


Now here I am, a piece of God's art.
If you are still a decaying canvas, give God the brush and let Him start.

Dōs moi pā stō, kai tan gān kināsō

Give me a place to stand and I will move the earth.
I believe I have felt this way since the day of my birth.

Wherever it is that God allows me to stand
I would hope to shake the world and show the power of His hand.

Wherever it is that He allows me to place my feet
I will absolutely, under no circumstances, be discreet.

Jeremiah said it was a fire shut up in his bones.
I will cry out to The Almighty. No need for stones.

Give me a place to stand and I will reach up and touch the divine.
I will pull it down with all of my might until His glory does shine.

One man believed this and changed all mankind.
He said someone has to give their life and I am giving mine.

He knew no matter where His feet walked
glory was poured out and evil was blocked.

He understood that He Himself was power.
He knew He was The Almighty, The Savior, The Strong Tower.

He had a knowing that He was the One that would save us all.
He knew good and well He could take all of us from Saul to Paul.

He knew no matter where He stood He would transform the world.
Jesus knew without a doubt His impact was plural.

I want with all my heart to be like this man.
So Jesus, please give this girl a place to stand.

Give me a place to stand and I will move the earth.
I will give your life purpose. Your death, your resurrection, your birth.

MOM

Mom.
Remember when you got me ready for prom?
You made sure I had the best dress, the best hair, the best shoes, everything. You were the bomb!

Liz.
Remember when you were all up in my biz?
Checkin up on me 24/7. BLOWIN up my phone when you became a textin whiz.

Friend.
Remember when we would sing in the car, be loud, laugh and grin?
Any time I have been down you have been able lighten my spirits and lift up my chin.

Role model.
You have helped me choose to never smoke, never drug it, never even pick up a bottle.
You have taught me to live my life full force, all the way, full throttle!

You have from day one supported all of my dreams.
You have taught me to be me until i'm bursting from the seams.

You push me, push me, push me until I am about to fall down.
But I never do fall. I find myself soaring miles and miles above the ground.

I can laugh with you like I can with no one else.
You have taught me the house will catch on fire if I leave a candle burning until it melts!!!!!

One thing I really love about you Mom
is that you support JADEDEKELAITA.COM.

I also love your ability to laugh.
If we tried to calculate the volume of it, it'd go right off of the graph.

I also love the strength that you display.
Sure you cry during cheesy commercials and dramatic moments in a play.
But the inner, unspoken strength that you have shown me
is what makes me the woman I am known to be.

Mom, I am so incredibly proud that you are my mother.
I literally, absolutely, without a doubt would never wish to have another.

You know me better than any living being.
You have seen the good, the bad and the ugly and still love everything you're seeing.

So, I don't know. I don't know exactly what to say?
Thank you and I love you seem so cliche.

Mom, you aren't perfect and sometimes you lack the cool.
But if I could tell the world the truth. It'd be this: I want to be just like you.

Bound.

Here, with you, I am bound.
Lost. So lost that I am found.

I am tied to you eternally with no need of a knot.
My heart, My life, My soul, You got.

I am stuck to you with no need for any glue.
When you called my name at the age of 12, my heart jumped, soared. It flew!

I am embedded in you with no need for a HTML code.
You paved my way. Now I'm walking that road. 

I am melted in you with no need for a flame.
You burn in me. Yesterday. Today. Forever. The same.

I am wrapped in you with no need for paper, boxes and tags.
You love me vigorously. It never ever lags.

I am yours. You are mine. 
You and me. There's no space, no distance, no time. 

You are the Savior. The Lord. The King.
In your hand is power over everything.

With your word the world began.
One whisper and the oceans obey and mountains stand. 

You alone are power.
I can feel you rushing over me every second of every hour.

What more. What more can I say? 
I am so proud to be apart the life, the truth, the way. 

You are God and I love you.
I am so aware. So aware that you love me too.

H.O.P.E.

It's on days like these that I'm filled with an indescribable hope.
Emptiness has tried to get me to shake it's hand so many times. Nope!

Hope for what you may ask.
This hope is for my calling, my assignment, my task! 

This hope is in the promise that God has made me.
I'll cling to it until the dreams in my heart become a reality I can see.

The arms of my expectancy are embracing what He has called mine.
Hope is welcome in my home with the constant invitation to dine. 

Hope is not something that you can define.
It's not something you can calculate or place on a timeline.

It's not something you can articulate with your lips.
It's not something you can find or accomplish through someone's list of tips.

Hope is an eternal, indescribable, undefinable spark.
It's the most brilliant of lights that outshines everything dark.

Hope is both silent and insanely loud.
Hope can stand alone with no intimidation in a doubt flooded crowd.

Hope is delicate with the power of all the force in Heaven.
Hope is yours! Whether you're a child or you're one hundred and eleven. 

Hope is unique. Beautiful. To this world, maybe even odd.
Hope, in my opinion, is God. 

DAD

There is a love that is so incredibly strong and connected that it need not be spoken.
A love like this... you can try and try and try. It will not be broken.
Even when the greatest separation comes in and tries to yank it apart.
Yes, even death cannot steal the love that abounds between me and my dad's heart.
I can't see you anymore, but I know where you are.
I can't touch you anymore, but I know you aren't far.
You are there. You're in that place where there is no sad, no tears, no pain.
You're in that place where all sorrow is washed away and Jesus did yesterday, does today and will forever reign.
I miss you, Pops. Miss you indeed.
But there ain't nothing like being with the King of kings.
There is a love that even with a plethora of words you cannot define.
I have it known it with you Dad, and now as you stand in the throneroom of God you can say,
"THIS LOVE IS MINE!"